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Is small talk really that bad?

Posted on September 1, 2022 by Author

Is small talk really that bad?

Research once suggested small talk makes us unhappy — here’s why that’s not true. A study in 2010 found that small talk was associated with lower life satisfaction. But a follow up study has found this actually isn’t the case. Small talk isn’t as important as deep, meaningful conversations — but it isn’t bad either.

Why do I have a hard time with small talk?

One of the reasons many of us hate small talk is that the topics themselves feel meaningless. Try to approach small talk conversations as an opportunity to learn more about the person you’re talking to, rather than trying to find something meaningful in the topic.

Do extroverts like small talk?

The general answer is yes, extroverts like small talk. They enjoy conversation which others might regard as pointless, as they find it a useful exercise in getting to know somebody before moving the conversation moves on to more specific subjects. Some people asked me “why do extroverts talk so much”.

Is it good to make small talk?

Why small talk is necessary Mildly flattering. Clearly, you don’t think they’re an ogre. It shows you’re friendly or at least, you probably won’t hurt them, physically or otherwise. It’s a low-risk way of saying you’re interested in getting to know them for a short time at first.

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How do I skip small talk?

Read on to see the best of what we uncovered.

  1. Have some ‘deep’ conversation starters on hand.
  2. Ask questions about topics the other person is interested in.
  3. Find out what makes the other person special.
  4. Avoid discussing the weather.
  5. Assume the other person has deep thoughts.
  6. Don’t push people to see your perspective.

Why do Infj hate small talk?

INFJs hate anything they consider fake, which includes surface-level conversation. This personality type likes to skip the less important chit-chat and get down to the heart of the matter. Anything else just feels like a waste of time, and that is something INFJs simply can’t stand.

Which personality type likes small talk?

Of all the personality types, Assertive Protagonists (ENFJ-A) were the most likely to feel comfortable with small talk (89\%). These People Masters have an uncanny knack for identifying areas of common interest and using them to bond with others.

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Why do I hate small talk?

The most common reasons that introverts hate small talk are: Boring and no point: Introverts prefer deeper conversation, normally with a few select friends. Discussion about random irrelevant rubbish serves no point and is boring. It’s fake: Small talk, to some, is fake.

Should I skip small talk?

Although it may feel lame at first, having small talk is actually really important and isn’t something to skip. Research has identified that as we meet new people, we feel the urge to reduce our uncertainty about them. Uncertainty in these moments typically comes from a desire to assess compatibility.

Do Intj like small talk?

INTJs truly dislike small talk, and become quickly drained by meaningless conversations. They would prefer to save their social energy for discussions that truly intrigue them.

Why is it so hard to make small talk with people?

Small talk can be especially difficult when you’re already feeling lonely. This kind of surface-level interaction can contrast badly against the kinds of deep, meaningful conversations you’re craving. Try not to let this stop you from making small talk altogether. Moving from small talk into a meaningful discussion is a skill you can learn.

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Is small talk ‘bothering’ others?

Although you might feel that small talk is ‘bothering’ others, people enjoyed being approached for conversation as much as they did approaching others. Not one single person in this study reported being rebuffed when starting a conversation.

What topics should you not talk about in small talk?

Religion is another extremely personal and potentially sensitive topic that should be avoided. 2  Talking about sex or asking questions of an intimate nature is inappropriate during small talk. When talking with strangers, avoid talking openly about sex or making sexual innuendos. Both are likely to make others uncomfortable.

Why is small talk so important in a relationship?

Small talk helps people warm up to each other. Since you can’t go straight to “deep talk”, all relationships start with small talk. You’ll enjoy it more by learning how to transition to meaningful topics quicker.

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